On a standard Friday evening, I finish up dinner and get ready for a night out. As my curling iron heats up, my make-up palette awaits and my chosen outfit lies on the bed, Nelly Furtado’s ring tone alerts me to a text message. It’s from a close friend who texts everyone on weekends to alert us of plans.
Tonight it’s bowling and then a late-night movie. Sounds good. A minute later, Nelly’s tone rings again, alerting me that my friends are texting to make sure I’m coming and to figure out who’s driving.
My cell phone is the glue for my social life. Or rather, it was. Living without a cell phone since mine broke in October has shed light on what my cell phone did for me. It kept me in the social loop and provided a convenient way to communicate with my friends every night.
Being disconnected means not having a clock with me and not being able to make a phone call or receive a text message. It also means as much being late to work, having no phone in case of an emergency and missing out on parties and apologied.
We teens use our mobiles to listen to music, take pictures, check calendar notes, instant message and — most important — communicate with each other through calling or text messaging.
Cell phones teens’ top choice for connecting with friends
According to the 2006 Harris Interactive YouthQuery, which surveyed 1,726 youth ages 8 through 18, cell phones are the number one choice for arranging to meet with friends — 36 percent, having quick conversations – 29 percent, contacting a friend when bored — 25 percent and inviting people to a party or event — 22 percent.
Text messages continue to grow more popular – the evidence includes new phone designs with full-on QWERTY keypads and all the fingers texting in a high school hallways between classes. For short questions about homework, setting meeting times or for saying something funny, sending a quick text beats dialing, ringing and holding the standard conversation. I also use text messages to make sure things are okay with friends when tensions arise.
Making up is hard to do
When my cell phone broke two months ago, I instantly disconnected from my friends, my social life, my world. A fight with my best friend started that weekend and still hasn’t fully healed because I am not connected.
Normally, when our debates at school turn a little heated, all we need to chill out and be okay is a simple text message that says, “Hey, you good?” Even sharing a random fact like “Whoa, my car just made the weirdest noise,” means we are officially made up. Calling wouldn’t be the same. Can you call someone and say, “Hey, you ready to talk?”
After my friend made a snide remark, I decided to text her Sunday night so that we could be okay by Monday. The problem: no cell phone. We went through Monday silent and awkward, because we had never had such a prolonged fight before.
That entire week consisted of awkward glances and uncertainty. “Is Tanya ignoring me? Why hasn’t she responded? What is this?” she wondered. Meanwhile, I thought, “Has she texted me? Is she ready to talk? I’m really clueless.” I couldn’t believe how disconnected I was from her without my cell phone.
I used three phones from my friends to text her, but that implied to my friend that they were siding with me. Hence, they were drawn into the drama, and they banned me from borrowing phones to make personal phone calls.
Borrowing phones is no substitute for reconnecting to the social world on my own. Being online or using my house phone is not an option. Being online is inconvenient and impersonal. Texting gives a personal touch because people always have their phones with them and respond when they want. I sometimes wonder why my friends can’t just call my home phone, but when I had a cell phone I never remembered to clue in a phoneless friend.
Clueless on Friday nights
On yet another phoneless Friday night, I watch TV after dinner. Sometimes I catch myself expecting Nelly’s tone to alert me to a text message. But I’m out of the loop, clueless about the weekend plans. I didn’t think not having a cell phone would make me feel so left out.
As soon as I have enough money, I’m getting a new phone, and I have a pretty clear idea who the first person I’m going to text is. I know that relationships and friendships shouldn’t be determined by text messages. But my cell phone has become part of the teen lifestyle, providing features that make our hectic lives a little simpler.
Maybe I am addicted to my cell phone, but what’s wrong with being dependent on something that makes me feel included and is always there for me when I need it? Regardless, I’ve still learned that cell phones are no substitute for real conversations with people. I know I have to work on my face-to-face comfort level, because I wouldn’t want my conversations with my friends ultimately to be only through text messages.
Thanks for all who comment.
Thanks for all who comment. Your input will be shared with my Jr and Sr Language Arts students.
Peace from Gila Bend, AZ
In my opinion the schools
In my opinion the schools should just simply ban cell phones during class anyways. You already know how annoying it is when someone’s cell phone rings in a packed movie theatre during the show.
no cell phones during class time, just during free periods
At my school, no one is oblivious enough to try to text during a class- a class of 15 or less students. Cell phones are banned during the school day, which I don’t agree with. However, I understand that they should not be in use for texting or for anything during class. As a student, texting would definitely hinder my learning abilities during class. Texting is equivalent to verbal communication, except it requires more concentration because instead of speaking, you are using your phone and punching key pads. If a classroom rule exists that prohibits side conversations, this would include texting. Teachers should have the right to take away a cell phone as an object that distracts students from learning.
However, general school rules should not prohibit cell phones during the school day, especially during free periods. Students at my school are allowed to use iPods and laptops for leisure during free periods, and I’m not sure why cell phones are excluded from this. The new rule should incorporate the explanation behind a cell phone ban, and if there isn’t a good one, cell phones should only be banned from class rooms. The punishment for using any features on a cell phone during class should be severe enough to make students realize they have to keep it out of the class room. This is similar to prohibiting games on calculators during class; a few students will try to sneak it in, but maybe you can spend some time brainstorming and discussing some methods that will prevent students who still try to text during class.
I hope this helps!
Tanya
texting during class
What happens to students at your school who text during class? I am a high school teacher, and we are debating this issue. Should phones be turned off during class? Should they be put in a box until the end of class to insure no one texts? Does hiding the texting (don’t deny it!) distract from learning? Should teachers be allowed to take away your phones? Under what conditions should texting during class be ok? A lot of schools say, no cell phones in the handbook, but everyone has them anyway. The rules should be rewritten, then, to keep up with the times. How should the new rules read?
Thanks for all who comment. Your input will be shared with my Jr and Sr Language Arts students.
Peace from Gila Bend, AZ
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